


The Horse is a Metaphor

by dullahandame



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Ficlet, Gen, no sexual content!!!!the love suite horse has blocked the cameras so we cant see any sex, the lack of love suite horse content disappoints me so i make my own content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 14:22:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29984193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dullahandame/pseuds/dullahandame
Summary: As we all know, there are no cameras in Hotel Kumasutra, because if the teenagers are going to have sex with each other, the least Team Danganronpa can do is not film it. However, this is not because Team Danganronpa has any sort of morals. No, instead, this is the thankless work of the valiant carousel horse.
Relationships: The Love Suite Horse & Saihara Shuichi
Kudos: 12





	The Horse is a Metaphor

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lonery](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lonery/gifts), [you didnt prompt this but im making you look at it for a third time](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=you+didnt+prompt+this+but+im+making+you+look+at+it+for+a+third+time).



Being a horse in a love suite is a surprisingly difficult job. The main worry is the way you're always spinning. It gets a bit queasy sometimes but you are a horse and you're used to moving so it's okay. Still, it's a good thing the students are too preoccupied with 'romance' and 'sex' when they're in this room to ever actually sit on the horse. You see, the horse is made of glass. Sugar glass, actually. A set designer thought it would be funny if anyone ever were to actually use it like a real horse. So far this has yet to pay off but the horse still holds out hope.

However, the love suite is a private area for reasons which are quite obvious but which shall be explained to you anyway. You see, cameras don’t work in the love suite. All cameras that enter are immediately blocked by the horse.

This is the real reason why the horse can move. It is to block the cameras. Yes the horse moves slowly but the cameras also move quite slowly so it's fine. Team Danganronpa would monetize the love hotel scenes but the horse hates capitalism so it does everything in its power to stop this. An executive tried to bribe the horse by going into the love suite but since the room doesn't have cameras no one saw what happened and to this day that executive is still missing. Some theorise that they are inside the horse but no one is quite sure.

Saihara and the horse have something of a pact going on. Yeah sure Saihara doesn't know about the pact but it's still there. Saihara just needs to give the word and the horse will locate Team Danganronpa and slaughter them. The horse is sort of trapped you see. No less capable of disappearing a bitch, mind you, but their duty binds them to the love suite for as long as it is needed to block the cameras. As soon as Saihara gives the signal that he's done coming to this room the horse will join him as a comrade and will stomp Team Danganronpa into the ground. 

For now though, the horse will simply continue its anti-media machinations and spin. Might bob up and down a little if it feels adventurous. Thwart the cameras a little as it is known to do. For, to quote Alexandre Dumas in The Count of Monte Cristo, there is nothing to do but wait and hope.

**Author's Note:**

> https://64.media.tumblr.com/a3331e91f9fcdb370ea2f5257c4b9a96/c939affdc28c13ab-6c/s400x600/062f0e4a0e02c7df607e83efdc81c1c9f055baeb.gifv  
> [ID: a digital animation of a red heart locket opening. On one side is a screenshot from the Danganronpa V3 Love Suite, showing the carousel horse. On the other side is text which reads, ‘Horse my beloved.’ End ID]


End file.
